I’m Making This Hard

Pookah would like to point out that cats, being the epitome of civilization in our habits, do not have this problem. We use litterboxes… even outdoors. All of our problems are neatly and discreetly contained, then returned to the natural environment where they are converted by natural processes into resources for natural scratching posts – what humans call, “Trees.”

We all run into it: That one repeating habit or attitude that constantly derails us and screws up our lives.

For S.O., it’s regular monitoring of finances.

For me, the most recent one was getting my workbench built.
It’s that project, task, or job that keeps coming up, nagging the back of your mind, needs to be done, and you Just. Can’t. Get. It. Done.

The excuses are many: I’m too tired. I don’t have enough time. I don’t have enough money. There are other things I need to get done first. It’s too hot. It’s too cold. This one’s too soft. This one’s too hard. I’m not really up to it today. On and on.

It’s all a load of Horse Puckey!

The only thing making it hard is you. Or in this case, me. I mean, really, how hard is it to take out a tape measure, screws, drill, saw, wood, and put the darn thing together? Not very. Takes a few hours, very long hours in the heat baking our portion of the primordial scrub. But once it’s done, it opens up all these tantalizing possibilities! It doesn’t have to be perfect – generally level, at most; and sturdy!! It’s gotta support a drill press and whatever I’m drilling, sawing, hammering, etc.

There is some blockage, some self-defeating, I’m-not-worthy, I-don’t-want-to-face-this-problem endless loop going on. And I can’t seem to break out of it.

Sometimes, you’ve just got to admit that YOU are the biggest impediment to your own success.

So, here’s what I’m doing:

1. Identify the goal: Get the %&$*($@& workbench built.
2. Enlist help.
3. Get your butt to work.
4. ???
5. Finished.

1. Identifying the Goal.
This is the easy part. What is it, exactly, that you want to accomplish? Build a workbench? Save up $10,000 for an emergency fund? Right. Build a workbench. Write it down. (If you’re already living life like Pookah, it’s already written down – you’re just having trouble actually doing it.)

2. Enlist Help.
If this is one of those tasks, projects, or whatever that you can’t get done, ENLIST SOME HELP!! Hey, S.O.? I need a day to get the fracking workbench built. Can you keep after me until I get it done, and remind me that *I* am making this hard? Could you also help me clear out my schedule for that day so that I don’t have any interruptions for that day? Thanks!

3. Get your butt to work.
OK, recruit. Your mission is to get that thing done. No stalling. No excuses. Get your butt off that couch and do it!! This monkey has been on your back like a sack of potatoes for too long! Time to get that monkey off your back! Time to make some potato stew!! Yumm!! Tastes Great!

I’d make a lousy drill sergeant.

You have got to clear enough time out in one spot to either get the whole thing done – without any interruptions or other time pressures; or get the first step done (if it’s too big to do in one go). That second one is harder, and you’ll keep repeating the steps above until the whole thing is done.

P.S. The amount of time you think you need to get it done? Double it. Remember, you’re literally fighting yourself on this one.

4. ???.
What? You want me to do all the work?!

Heh! Step 4 is pretty basic. DO IT UNTIL IT’S DONE!!!
Every time something comes up to interrupt you, slow you down, stop you, imagine it’s the most annoying, aggravating, emotionally torturing bully you ever encountered in high school (or at your job, at the daycare, wherever). Now imagine him or her, stuck naked on a toilet, on a stage, in front of the entire school (company, PTA, whatever large crowd of people they’d have to see every day for the next six months).

That’s your problem. Right there. On the commode. Helpless. Naked.

With no toilet paper.

Now flush.

Someone comes up to you with a non-life-threatening problem to solve, flush. Smile at the thought (fantasizing is great). Then tell them you’re busy, please go away.

(It does help if you tell them to please go away while holding a power tool, not quite pointed in their direction. Remember, subtle hints, readers. Subtle hints.)

Pookahs show our claws, or just dig the tips in a little bit. This is particularly effective on Pookah’s human, especially on the legs.

5. Finished.
First, gut-check. Are you REALLY finished? No? Got more steps to do? Back to the beginning. Use this as a car to run over that mental tape recorder spewing failure and excuses.

You’re REALLY finished? Yes? Woo-hoo!! Celebrate. Show off your accomplishment to friends and family. Kick back with a package of fresh cherries or blueberries and cream. REWARD yourself. Take note of your friends’ and family’s reaction. If they aren’t happy for you, you may want to watch for toxic behavior.

The idea is to help overcome that obstacle with some positive reinforcement. Getting that reinforcement from other people is IMPORTANT!

When you next get that nagging, I-should-really-get-that-thing-done, feeling, get ready to flush it again.

Bathrooms never sounded so good.

Disgusting! You humans don’t even use sand!

One Response to “I’m Making This Hard”

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